Today I am sad and miserable and blue
Today I am hurt and don’t know what to do
Today I grieve, I lost my greatest hero
Today I’m lost, I’m weary and low.
Today, I have no idea who I am
Today I am shaking, a soon-slaughtered lamb
I don’t know why I’m here, nor how I should be
I want to free myself
from always trying to be…
The best, the perfect, version of me
Though I know, I’ll swell like a blimp, I wanna eat biscuits and bread and chips and Ice-cream and stuff it ALL down, coz you see feelings like these are alien to me.
I don’t know what to do, to express and let go I just don’t now how and it’s killing me slow
Today I want to be open and real and raw and wide and honest and open and true
Today… Can I give myself permission to spew
The hurt and regret for the Me, still unknown
The me wringing hands, confused and undone,
for the life I still seek, for the seeds not yet sown?
Will I have time?
Today I wonder; When will it feel right?
But surely by now I shouldn’t be so uptight?
Today I wonder why, who, when, what, where and how?
Do I truly have the power to manifest the glory I vowed?
Though I know the theory and I feel it in my bones…
We are pure essence, pure beauty, pure connection, pure love,
It’s just out of reach, out of sync
Today I don’t want pity or sympathy or comfort or speech
Today, just for one day
I just want to be free
Of every expectation I’ve ever placed on me.
I want to sit by a lake in my fear and be soothed, open up to the breeze and admit
I don’t KNOW!
For today, I want to love me, snuggle up to myself & find the key…
Unlock the door to MY my talents, my gifts, my inner, my peace
the me I am waiting…
No, yearning to see
just for one day
This is ME…
This is the best, the very best I can be…
(perhaps just for today)
Blissings & Much Love