Happy Bank Holiday Monday all,
Good morning again from a rather rainy Toronto & a cloudy London. Today I thought I’d consider the challenge of ‘Being you.’
There’s a quotation attributed to Coco Chanel:
‘Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself’
How do we obtain & maintain a sense of self when many of the messages we receive create and persist in ‘reinforcing the notion that we simply not enough?’ Firstly, let me apologise for the fact that I have been out of range for the last couple of weeks and so unable to write to you all. As I began to write this it was Saturday afternoon and one of those rare moments when I’ve slowed down a bit. You know one of those dull afternoons when you feel listless and want to stay cosy inside. The TV was on for some rare ‘chilling’ time on the sofa with my sis.
In need of a fix
An advertisement comes on, nothing unusual there…but it was an ad for a dating site. The one that followed was for slimming aids, then Febreze, then a baldness cure and as I watched I detached slightly. A thought occurred to me: How can you ever see being you as ok when the overriding message is one of ‘Not enoughness?’ That to be seen, make a difference, achieve in ANY WAY we need to be fixed?
The deficiency paradigm
These messages sent to us from the plethora of images we meet daily, hourly both pictorial and written, is one of deficiency. We are perpetually bombarded with the idea that we need fixing, that we’re just not good enough and quite frankly it made me tired!
Too single, too fat, too dirty too bald, too old, not old enough, feet too ugly, not tanned, slim, tall or rich enough…the list goes on and I’m sure you catch my drift.
Is it any wonder then that the lens through which feel able to see the world is rather foggy and a somewhat gloomy one?
I guess the strategy works?
If we’re subdued into a state of perpetual fatigue, constantly using our energies to bat away thoughts of unworthiness, inadequacy and not enoughness, how can we hope to find the mental & physical energy required to strive, become educated, to love to sing, to laugh? To find the path to being you. Fully realised, authentic and content with who you are? I imagine many of you reading this will be feeling listless, lacking enthusiasm for you life and it’s not surprising as this message overload is constant. The best way to counter this is simple. TURN IT OFF!
Take the Challege
Never mind Ice-bucket challenges! I challenge each of you reading this to turn off the Tv, eshew newspapers & magazines and social media… give your mind & spirit a negativity holiday for a week and notice how you feel & how your thoughts change. Ok for you real info junkies try a day or two! Once you shut out the bombardment you may find yourself surprised by how satisfied and grateful you begin to feel. Once you tap into these feelings of gratitude & satisfaction you begin to generate more (much as you did with the feelings, of dissatisfaction). Don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean ‘stuff’ won’t happen, but when it does, you’ll find your attitude to the ‘stuff’ shifting. Events will seem less disastrous and insurmountable. The satisfaction you now feel will extend itself to yourself and you’ll realise you’ve more than enough. You’re fine just as you are… right where you are.